Tuesday, January 20, 2015

"I Don't Have a Problem!": A Digestive Post

And I can quit dairy and gluten anytime I want to ... she said as she flushed the milk out of her system with a giant bottle of water.

In the middle of the night/a dairy binge, I posted this photo to Facebook:

Yeah, we have an M.O.
It was all well and good a few posts ago when I said to lay the wheat and butter on me all year long. I'd been doing well with both for a while now. Then came last night, when I ended up needing (and this is so TMI) an anti-diarrheal, an anti-spasmodic, and two anti-nausea tablets ... and this morning, I topped it off by needing a Lactaid, but I couldn't find one. How is it that I convince myself time and time again that I can eat how normal humans eat when I was having a colonoscopy this time last year (and meeting my deductible in the first month of 2014! woohoo!) at age 30 and that I have a GI doctor that I'll need to see once a year from now on?! What makes me think butter is okay when it's a known trigger for me? What makes me think the same about wheat? What makes me think ANY FOOD IS SAFE?!?

My dairy-evacuating bottle looks upon newer versions of itself. Love Klean Kanteen
Whenever I read fat activism books or blogs, I desperately want to be that fat person who doesn't give two shits what you think of what I'm eating. But I'm so sad right now, and sadness has never accompanied my dietary flip-flops before (sadness has definitely accompanied my gastrointestinal flip-flops, but that's why I have a prescription for Bentyl). Now I have to figure out how to care and not care at the same time. Pinterest, here I come!

No comments: