Saturday, November 23, 2013

Lament

Wow ... the last time I blogged was to put up my Christmas list? Sorry about that.

So it's 4:30 in the morning, I'm drinking a fruity tea (Comfort & Joy, the Christmas tea) that was not made to be mixed with coconut milk or maple syrup (both in there), I'm reading the Oh She Glows blog, and I'm navel gazing. I'm fat--don't care. I'm unhealthy--do care. And I'm not the only one: Chris is pre-diabetic. What's the point in getting good insurance and a good doctor if you're only going to get bad news?!

(They think I have diverticulitis, btw.)

The mastermind behind the Oh She Glows blog (which is a wonderful name for a blog, I might add) struggled with eating disorders for a long time. This resulted in period problems, which I too have,  thanks to PCOS. So I can't help but feel a little kinship. Right now, I'm perusing her gluten free recipes and pinning them to Pinterest as I see fit.

After failing at veganism and lambasting that little experiment, I've decided to do it again. Except I call it "veg". Veg means I'm not going to hate myself if, when I'm going out to eat, I'm forced to eat gluten-free bread that contains eggs--I mean, I can make gluten-free bread with chia eggs at home, but gluten-free bread without some kind of binder is near impossible. And in a non-veg world, that means the most easily accessible thing: eggs.

Oh, how I miss the days of going out hiking and, even though I was the fat girl, being able to hoof it just fine. Now I'm a mess. I need to get back into eating right and doing yoga and traipsing across the plains of North Texas. The dream of making it to Guadalupe Peak still exists. Meanwhile, this is ideal weather for hiking. Well, almost--I can bundle up for the cold temps, but the rain needs to stop for a while. And looking at the weather ... well, good luck with that. (Snow on Sunday and Monday, apparently.)

Anyway, I need to go finish cleaning some raspberries (because it's raspberry season, you know) for breakfast cookies that I'm making. Navel gazing over. Chandler--OUT!

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